Lost and found… (Repost)
2/9/2023: Featuring new content…
The Beautiful Game
Image by MustangJoe from Pixabay
Fast forward. I spent the better part of the next decade cultivating my skills on the soccer field.
Conversely, my becoming a “rockstar” was no longer on my setlist. Music had taken a much less prominent role and instead faded into the background, much like the soundtrack to a movie, my movie. Seemingly overnight, my Raleigh BMX, my Rob Roskopp skateboard, my guitar, and my Casio keyboard had all gone missing and sadly, no one, including I, were searching for them.
Memories…
Photo Credit: Anthony Woodard
Instead, I was squarely focused on becoming the best athlete that I could, dedicating endless hours to learning, training, and competing. Most of my time, including nearly all of my weeknights, weekends, and even our family vacations, involved the “Beautiful Game” and its plethora of tryouts, practices, camps, games, and tournaments. Prior to high school, five, even six days of most weeks, involved soccer. My summers were spent on a blazing hot, sometimes stormy, pitch, with the remainder of each year spent on bright green fields of AstroTurf, illuminated by mercury vapor lights buzzing overhead.
That being said, I deeply cherished that time in my life. I met so many people, fellow travelers, several of whom became my competitors, teammates, and ultimately friends; my brothers, some of whom I would later see again on the venerable fields of high school varsity soccer and beyond.
In addition to my own time on the field, some of my fondest memories were of attending dozens of professional indoor soccer games with my family and friends. I remember watching the players, my idols, some of which were only ten or twelve years older than me, all while envisioning my own future glory; names like Gordon Hill, Tasso Koutsoukos, Kim Røntved, Branko Šegota, the late Stan Stamenkovic, Tatu, and many others. Music, especially that of Genesis, Yes, and other artists that defined the “Big 80s”, created the soundtrack for these times.
Gordon Hill and coach Pat McBride of the Kansas City Comets circa 1984
Source: nasljerseys.com; Photographer: Unknown
Soccer (a/k/a football, fútbol, fussball, calcio) also allowed me to learn about other faces and places, far away from my home; there’s a big world out there. As with music and cuisine, sport, especially the Beautiful Game, can facilitate an unspoken bond across humanity, despite our otherwise cultural, language, and daily differences. In addition to looking up to the gridiron greats of that time, new names, idols from a different kind of football, came into my consciousness. For me, names like Lothar Matthäus, Hugo Sanchez, Gary Lineker, Michel Platini, and “Gli Azzurri”, along with places like Estadio Azteca, Maracanã Stadium, and Wembley, became top of mind. I learned about the legend of the late Pele, the paramount figure of our game, ‘O Jogo Bonito’. But for me, it was World Cup ‘86 and that tournament’s iconic superstar, the legendary Argentinian footballer, the late Diego Maradona, that together became my “gold standard”. Author’s Note: Looking back at that moment in time still stirs a wonderful, hair standing-on-end-type of emotion. For a quick glimpse, please watch the 2014 short film titled “Maradona '86”, from the ESPN “30 for 30” series, directed by Sam Blair.
“The Icon”
Image by TAHAR DJEMMAD from Pixabay
In a few short years, my life had changed. I changed. The soundtrack of my life, like a movie soundtrack, became a reflection of the times. Even my favorite band, Van Halen, had experienced a major change with the introduction of a new lead singer, Sammy Hagar. Songs like “Best of Both Worlds”, “Dreams”, and “Why Can’t This Be Love” from their “5150” album were now indelibly tied to my time on the field. With movies like “Top Gun” and “Iron Eagle”, along with the unforgettable music video for the song Dreams, which featured footage of the U.S. Navy Blue Angels, 1986 also became the year of the fighter pilot (or naval aviator) for countless teenagers across America, myself included.
“We'll get higher and higher. Straight up we'll climb…” - “Dreams” by Van Halen
Source: U.S. Navy Blue Angels
Over the next few years, the fields of athletic battle moved from those of competitive clubs and AAU to those of high school varsity districts and summer leagues. However, my soundtrack, like millions of others, stayed in southern California, where for me the sounds of the Sunset Strip later united with those of South Central, to create the ultimate mixtape.
“Flying high in April, shot down in May” (or October), October of 1990 to be precise.
Everything to that point had fallen into place. The years of hard work, setbacks, and victories, had finally culminated in a seemingly singular moment in time. We were coming to the end of the regular season of my senior year and we were gaining momentum. Ahead, was the district tournament and after that, most likely soccer at the collegiate level.
Cut right… [all while rockin’ a mullet…] Fun fact: After four overtime periods, that semi-final game remained tied and went to a penalty shoot-out, that we ultimately won. At the time, it was believed to be the longest playoff game in Missouri high school soccer history.
Photos from our previous-year’s district semi-final game circa November 1989
As I remember, it was around halftime and I was advancing the ball from midfield into the offensive zone. The ball got away from me, as I quickly cut right, towards the inside of the field. As the opposing midfielder was closing in for the takeaway, unbeknownst to me, another opponent was closing in from behind. While extending and turning my right foot outward in order to regain possession (something that I knew not to do…), I shifted my weight, and at the moment I made contact with the ball (and the ground), my extended leg and my body became sandwiched between both opposing players, with one player, his foot, and his inertia heading west, and me, along with the other player, heading east (all resulting in excessive valgus force). In a split second, my knee was wrecked and my season was over. It was the worst pain I had ever experienced. As I was helped off of the field and on to the bench to prepare for my eventual trip to the E.R., with my injured leg straightened, my lower leg still swung freely from side to side, like a pendulum, the sight of which caused one of my teammates to become nauseous.
My ride to the hospital was filled with a mixture of pain, disorientation, and fear, especially of what may lie ahead, surgery and further unknowns. Strangely, at a time filled with such uncertainty, I caught a glimpse of a familiar face as I re-entered the E.R., on my way back from having an X-ray. A few rooms down, a former teammate of mine who was then playing for a rival school, was also in the E.R and was in fairly rough shape. He was a striker, and as his dad explained, he collided mid-air with the raised knee of the opposing goalkeeper, sustaining an injury to his side, ribs, and a kidney. What were the odds...?
While my leg ultimately healed and I physically recovered, emotionally I did not. I merely went through the motions that final semester. I was disconnected, basically becoming a casual observer. My grades suffered and in turn, my interest in college and its (their) interest in me diminished. I just didn’t give a s@#%. I was lost. My own soundtrack would later reflect my perspective and outlook; bitterness mixed with elements of futility; hostility mixed with dashes of hubris. Coincidentally, the artists and music of the times reflected a similar mood.
My personal relationship with music, better yet, with sound, became ancillary, more tangential. Instead of plugging into a Marshall stack and strumming a “power chord”, I learned to design, craft, and install large carpet-covered subwoofer cabinets that emanated sound waves, which could be heard and felt blocks away; “Audio Thunder Designs” was what I called my endeavor. During that time my physical form had changed as well. Spurred along by a new found focus on my upper body, I went from a thin 165-pound frame, to a more robust 195-pound chassis, that could ultimately bench over 300 lbs. Listening to certain songs, fueled my training and my rage.
After a couple of years, while I was still lost in a mostly self-made wilderness, something began to stir inside me. I began to “hear” the music again, the guitar again. It was an awakening, similar to what was experienced by another teenager on the cusp of adulthood, who lived on a small farm, not far from my hometown. A young man who awoke one morning to a stirring, an innate curiosity that led him to a barn, wherein his own future journey was illuminated by the glow of a mysterious green crystal.
It was time.
Our stage was set…
October 2015: Stage set for Toxic A$$ets to perform at a local charity event
To be continued…
Epilogue: Around this time (1993-94), I also rekindled my relationship with the sport I loved; An encore performance (perhaps another story for another time…)
Tony’s Takeaways
We will almost certainly be faced with adversity, and unfortunately in some cases, tragedy and heartbreak. How each of us address these situations or events, is a personal journey that hopefully results in recovery, and even, growth.
In business (and life), the ability to adapt to unexpected stressors, disruptions, or adversity, and ultimately recover, is generally known as resilience. However, unlike my time astray in my mostly-self-made “wilderness”, organizations cannot survive in a state of suspended adolescence. Decisions must be made, and most often, must be made quickly. It is a fine line though, as the result of either haste or hesitation, will likely be failure. Companies and leaders must be agile. According to author David Koenig, “Agility, examines how firms create a consistent, repeatable ability to detect and assess changes in the competitive environment in real-time, and then take decisive action.” Are you ready?
Warranty Disclaimer
This Site (becomingarockstar.net and its author/contributors; together “Site”) does not warrant, endorse, guarantee, or assume responsibility for any product or service advertised or offered by a third party through this Site, including the YouTube, LLC, or any hyperlinked website or service. This Site is not affiliated with YouTube, LLC.
Limitation of Liability
You expressly understand and agree that this Site shall not be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, special, consequential or exemplary damages, including but not limited to, damages for loss of profits, goodwill, use, data or other intangible losses (even if this Site has been advised of the possibility of such damages), resulting from: (i) the use or the inability to use this Site or any hyperlinked website or service; (ii) the cost of procurement of substitute goods and services resulting from any goods, data, information or services purchased or obtained or messages received or transactions entered into through or from this Site or any hyperlinked website or service; (iii) unauthorized access to or alteration of your transmissions or data; (iv) statements or conduct of any third party on this Site or any hyperlinked website or service; or (v) any other matter relating to this Site or any hyperlinked website or service.